I've Heard More Than Footsteps

im so sick of this shit.. but its my purpose driven life
its not worth a fight .. plus, I wasn't given the rite
to speak of hurt & strife.. so i'll keep my thoughts quiet
& be thier support, while it.. cracks my back with violence
my silence hears the tears of eyelids.. they supply liquid pain
remains intact from its contact.. thier cries heard in vain
while thier words complain.. of utter hurt & distain..
I shut up & maintain .. obstain from saying what I think..
my pupils are wide open.. yet, im always praying to blink..
they're straying from hope &.. coping is just a way to sink..
to the bottom of depression.. dove in a bay of stink..
i smell the stench as it lessons.. any link, to a brighter future..
problem solving has been reduced to either a fight or shoot ya..
drug solutions get more attention than school life & computers..
it isn't rite, but who's ta.. say what's not, without being judged..
i feel i might.. i've been thru it all & still haven't budged..

I remain in solid form when dudes brawl outside a college dorm..
been stained with blood feeling warm..
only to be cleaned by a violent storm..
survived the norm.. along, with whats wierd & exciting..
wintessed some lives being lost .. while other's were tossed beside me..
i've been hit by lightening .. so of course, thunder isn't frightening
plus, do you think its rite to be.....
spit on, scraped, shit on, shaked & under rapes?..
or to be walked on be murderers, liars & fakes?..
i've got countless tire marks from brakes..
some done on purpose.. while others are careless mistakes..
for goodness sakes.. what makes you people act so crazy?..
i got.. ladies treating me like a foster daddy for thier babies
i got ..bumbs who ACT insanley cause they're just too fuckin lazy
& i got.. brothers making drug deals like "Fuck You, Pay Me"..

So now, it just don't phaze me.. Amazingly, i've blocked out my feelings..
shits going down!!..
......on top of me, whether its from fans or dropped from ceilings..
i dont give a damn.. cause man has not been real &..
how can i understand.. a human, if you men.. do not stop revealing..
your lack of compassion.. & start acting like people seem to imagaine..
"What If Everyone Loved Each Other & Acted In That Fashion?"..
BUT.. it's not gonna happen, so i'll just stop asking for a reaction..
& leave you to your attraction.. with misery & your passive "Its Alright" talk..

besides, who would even listen to Me... especially, since i'm just a Sidewalk


The Streets Is Watching...............

This was a dope piece E .. Dope concept .. Nicely written and a smooth read .. A lot of dope content thruout the piece .. Nice multi's and rhyme scheme to add to the enjoyability .. U brought the piece forward nicely .. Here's 2 of my fav. parts of the piece ..

I shut up & maintain .. obstain from saying what I think..
my pupils are wide open.. yet, im always praying to blink..
they're straying from hope &.. coping is just a way to sink..
to the bottom of depression.. dove in a bay of stink..

for goodness sakes.. what makes you people act so crazy?..
i got.. ladies treating me like a foster daddy for thier babies
i got ..bumbs who ACT insanley cause they're just too fuckin lazy
& i got.. brothers making drug deals like "Fuck You, Pay Me"..

I thought those parts said so much .. To me they did anyway .. Eye opening statements .. Good job .. Everything about this was nice .. But I felt that U could have worked the ending a little bit more .. It was nice .. But juss out there nah mean ? .. Didn't really hurt the piece .. But felt like U juss stopped the piece more then ending it .. Either way it was a nice read man .. Sick concept .. Keep bringin' ur stuff .. One

youe scheme had a nice complexity to it.... stayed pretty consistant.... with multis n blah blah... you heard it all before, but what i wasnt really feeling was the style... the way there was blocks of the same rhyming, like 2-3 in a lline then the next were the same... i prefer a coupla different at the same time, some was like that tho... some nice internals, but still a good read, jus it seemed to chop and changea bit..... but like i said its the style...... maybe im jus too set in my roots...lol..... good work..... hit my latest...

Thanks...

you are pretty good, you remind me so much of Jay-z and I love his music so chances are I will love yours

Ok.......

I shut up & maintain .. obstain from saying what I think..
my pupils are wide open.. yet, im always praying to blink..
they're straying from hope &.. coping is just a way to sink..
to the bottom of depression.. dove in a bay of stink..


^^i really like those particular lines...the whole verse i would give 4/5
complexity was good. The ending was aight...could worded better but nice drop imaginary piece no doubt ....

Check mine Wake Up Call. pzz

Very nice topic.. Damn you beat me to it.. Had a similar idea a while ago.. But was walls hearing things people say and so on.. Almost same.. Just no wordplay.. Footsteps - Sidewalk.. Blah..

Flowed nicely.. Smooth transisions.. Multi's were good and so on.. Not going to bore you with details of what you did right.. You can get noobs who ride your dick to tell you that.. :)..

Rhyme scheme wasnt exactly consistent.. It worked but it still wasnt consistent.. You had a variety in there.. Lol.. Only thing a can think of..

Felt the closer.. A think it is very nice when it is ended in that fashion.. Stating something so simple.. Yet that thing has heard and seen all those things.. Good..

Hit up something with my name on in OM..

Thanks..

Pz..

Appreciated...

really dope piece yo nice i liked this

Sickness - Flow was very tight - particulary in the first verse. But the thoughts got more complex as you entered the second and third verse. Second verse was my favorite. It was told so well I didn't even realize you were telling it from a perspective until the very end when you said so. Liked this:
"i've been hit by lightening .. so of course, thunder isn't frightening"
Very nice piece - hit my ELEETE collab if you get a chance. (Two Genuises - One Mind)

Thanks

Iight i thought this piece was great in some places but lacked some shit
in others. Your idea was nice and expression I could feel throughout the
piece but I thought ya lacked direction once you got going.

Flow-At the beginning it was consistent, as to in the middle except for some
niggles which weren't much of a stopping. Overall the flow was pure.

Vocab'-wasn't complex but it didn't need to be. Most peeps judge pieces
on the content of vocab but for like a piece you were doing
there didn't need to be an overwelming mass of vocabulary...I think
you just hit the right amount.

Story/Thought-It seemed to me there was more effort at the beginning&
end but lacked as much effort in the middle. But the middle did seem more
emotive. You explained well what you were thinking but I didn't catch
enough depth. Maybe multis shadowed them but I still thought
it was a nice subject to follow

pz