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topic: Fenced In
no non topical battlers should vote on this unless u really know what a topical is cuz i've seen people vote on topicals saying whoever had better punches so yeah... if u aren't topically intelligant.. don't vote lol
i'ma type my verse up now theo..just get urs on here asap
Fenced In
Enclosure to my perjure over throws the urge to escape
While exposure to this space leaves my starry eyes draped
Four walls overhaul gravities magnitude to my thought
As pressure try’s to pull im merely schooled in this court
All dimensions inflicting pressure my area grows lesser
Pleasure sacrificed in this measure for worse or for better
My expressions unseen…light beams pierce the darkness
The compression screens my dreams of an esteemed vastness
Isolation breaking....the reason….contemplating freedom
But the compassion shaking my mind denies me a reason
The perimeter closing my chosen path is now obstructed
Left conducted by the aspersion that the guilty constructed
Leaving me caged…enslaved…rage engaged just ignored
And all motions displayed…….don’t penetrate the core
Amounting to nothing the controllers bluffing commands
Only spiritual toughness can maintain my sitting on my hands
The same blood stained corners grow warmer in times
Because my brain is in trauma and my eyes turning blind
Oxygen lessens my lungs stress and seize contemplating
Mind resting………………the fence begins replicating
g/l
*A Baby's Cry*
Help! Oh Mother... I'm sufficating drastically
Come to my rescue, Otherwise witness a catrastaphy
The breaths i can't breathe, Outside of my reach
I can't see the light at the end that i seek
The clocks an enemy, Time is firmly against us
if you could turn the hands back, Would u quit drugs?
Admit it Mom, I'm trapped, Blambed squarly on you
I won't see my destination...Or the possibility of my own too
I'm horrified of you, You're carelessness of being a mother...
Has turned into a casulty, And teers among others
No wonder you kept smoking, It's obvious, I can't catch air
My mouth opens fragily just to get toxins here and there
not even born yet, But not like i'd I'll maintin life anyways
Doctors have submitted, You just request forgetting the baby
Her selfish plea came to reality, Like snatched from me...
Mom open your eyes please, Witness a bright future cease..
I'm not even a memory
No hatred amongst you cuz i can't mention...
You let me die! You kept me Fenced In!
uppin 1................................................. ........
Vote/Origin
Props to both here as both grabbed topic well
I was equalled in pretty much all cats except for
Flow which I think Origin came very Nicely in
Thrust once again produced a nice piece but jus lacked
Depth...not that thats a bad thing coz sumtimes
hanging on the fringes can be good but this time it
wudda helped to get deeper....
but overall nice topics followed
pz
MAKE SURE YA'LL CHECK THIS OUT PLZ WEN YA SSE THIS
MAD MAD MAD MAD SLEPT ON
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...6&page=1&pp=15
This was a good topical...
I really liked this...very close..
With theo.. I liked his flow..and imagery
really nice...structure was good too..
Trust's approach was very creative indeed
he came with a nice flow.. but lacked vocab..I thought
Very good read though..I was impressed by both
so
v/Theo
hit this up with an honest vote please...its getting slept on
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...=108562&page=1
uppin 2
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uppin 3
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i'm sorry but u can't just decide a vote by judging a better vocab
to me it clutters a verse with words you never use on an ordinary basis
i only use words i do use... i'm no dictionary
uppin
ZzZz
Uppin 4
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jesus this is slept on
last up
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