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Inpureities
As i Walk Freely over dirty terraine,Im gettin stabbed by Used old Needles//
Syringes peel back the skin of my feet,The babies Scream like Culled baby seals//
A system designed to take back what we earn,Is it rbbery,No-its TAX//
Therapists Ask always how we feel, "Im OK!",the governments on ya back//
Wage more for war that we all dissagree,silent night bombs take the homes of peasents//
No home to sleep in they serge for food, their father killed for stealin pheasent//
Laws dont concure to be left un-aided,wre branded thieves wen though shalt not steal//
But how we ment to take on a meal. Come on Tony Blaire, act up. Be real//
These dangerd species we call fine people, are all cut down, shared out to minoritys//
Periodicly were makin moves, to stoppin our nation discriminating stereotypically//
re-animated to be taken for gruanted,these antics crowned are the ones to be given//
if were a problem for Britain my leader,why is it at birth u let us poor ones be living//
my thoughts are strong now for instance im ressurecting,the late,the fallen TuPac//
So i can rebel against comercial Bitches,and i can pop him, and send his ass back//
im not the one who cares all about me, i mean im never the kind for security//
I like to think of my self as an Outkast, the kind who point out his planets Impurities.......
*All diffirent things that we call Impure...
All diffirent things that we can call Clean...
Are devided up into two diffirent Tiers...
One is real life and the other a Dream..*
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You need to leave 3 links or 3 names of people you left feedback to or this will get closed, Thanks.
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Tecnician
Too Easy
Dialekts
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That had a very decent flow, and some good meta's and shit. The topic is awesome, and the scheme is good. work on some more complicated rhymes thats all i can say as crit, if it is crit.
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lol...Thanx...And its E Z breh...!!
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Good Good Flow, And Meta And Rhyme Scheme Were Pretty Sick...Vocabulary Was Good Too...
8.33/10
return the favor....Peep "DRINK LIQUOR FROM A CHALICE"
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vocab and ideas in here were strong although some multis wouldve helped the flow of this, the bar length was a little too long as well, although i like the revolutionary raps which people seem to have forgotten about.
a notch above what i usually read i here, good work.
p.s: s.r. if youre gonna rate a rhyme out of ten, why the hell do you keep using decimels? the whole POINT of rating someone out of ten is to use a whole number!
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LOL @ decimals....
Im glad some1 relises the bar length..Its not something im trying so hard to do, but i thought about it, and decided to jus chek it out.....The multies and internal rhymin is somethin im sick of doing at the mo....So i decided to have change....Make it just a message verse or whateva... thanx all the same
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your alright man,youve got good vocab but your topics are abit too deep for people to relate to and understand, dont get me wrong though it makes sense
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Thanx for ur Oppinion Mate..!!
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yea this was soild... keep it comin